New Windows Upgrade

January 30, 2007 on 1:02 pm | In Other Stuff | 2 Comments

Be careful when upgrading or this just might happen to you!

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Golfing 3.6.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks, 
Troubled User

REPLY:
Dear Troubled User: 

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean & Sweep 3.0 , Cook my Dinner 1.5 and Pay the Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

PS installing a fresh copy of Girlfriend 8.5 is a possible but risky option. If you choose this option be sure to place it in a hidden folder on your hard drive.

I am not sure who the orginal author of this is or I would give credit. I just couldn’t resist posting it here. Especially since I have not posted anything for a while. Been busy busy busy. 

New years eve is party time

December 31, 2006 on 1:08 pm | In Get a Life | 2 Comments

Millions will be out to celebrate the new year. Many parties will go until the wee hours. Have fun and be safe. Make it a safe & happy new year.

Staying put would have been best

December 6, 2006 on 4:04 pm | In News Headlines | 2 Comments

Missing California father found dead Lost in snowy Oregon canyon; wife, two children found alive earlier

It’s sad when someone who cares enough to try anything to get help for his family ends in tragedy. The best advice is always to stay put, but I am sure that is easier said than done. Make the best use of the best shelter you can find and focus on survival. In this case the car was the only place to be. He is a hero to his family none the less.

Civil War in Iraq

November 27, 2006 on 11:41 am | In News Headlines | 1 Comment

The Bush administration avoids using the term civil war with regards to Iraq. They have established a pattern of denial of any terminology that has negative implications for reality. This from the spin masters who brought us phrases like “stay the course”, mission accomplished and most importantly the infamous acronym “WMD”. Most definitions of “civil war” include a reference to a conflict between factions within the same country. Using a rather simplistic approach to the question would lead to that conclusion that the War in Iraq is indeed a civil war. Today NBC & MSNBC anounced that they had concluded the terminology civil war does apply to the conflict in Iraq. I would have to agree and doubt any reasonable person would disagree. A Google Search for “civil war in iraq” yeilds over 23 million results.

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